.231

Well, last night I watched a lady get arrested for a DUI outside of my house. It's ironic because last week I watched a similar lady go to trial and kind of fight a DUI charge. The situation was interesting, I had just gotten home after spending almost 8 hours at our neighborhood bar. Now before anybody starts to 'TSKK TSKK' from afar, let me clarify...I tend bar until 7p.m. or so and then I'll usually BS for a bit with my boss (think Jimmy Buffet-but a commercial crab fisherman and not quite so charming), but I digress. I had just gotten home, unloaded some CO-OP produce and cracked a beer when I noticed police lights flashing outside of my house. I felt it was my civic duty to put down my beer (I didn't need any trouble) and sit outside on my porch and observe the whole situation from afar. I would want somebody to watch out for my rights and whatnot if I were ever to find myself in a similarly miserable situation.

The whole thing took maybe 20-30 minutes. I watched the lady do all of those tests you hear about. She stood there and played twenty questions, while getting flash-lighted in the eyes by a big 20 year old jock with a gun. She touched her nose, while closing her eyes. She walked heel to toe along a cracked sidewalk. She even did some weird balance type exercise that I'm thinking about incorporating into my half marathon training regimen. She stood there for long time and I thought she looked sober as a freaking bird, but then after all of that song and dance...The cop pulled out the 'Breathilizor' and she blew twice. I heard that cop tell her that she blew three times the legal limit! She blew a .231! I know legally that is way, way boozed up (in the 'legal' sense of boozed up). Let's just say that each drink an hour is worth a .03 or.04 and your body metabolizes one of those cocktails every hour.  That would mean that after 3 drinks in an hour, you would be in the ballpark of .09 or above...which is technically above the limit. That means this lady had 6 stiff drinks in an hour and then set out to head home. Or maybe she had 10 drinks in 2 hours and then decided to mosey on home via automobile. Anyway you shake it, she would have had to have tons to drink. Now, as a bartender, I am around a ton of people who drink  lots of drinks and are basically fine, save their gratuity skills, but that is neither here nor there and I really thought she looked good to go. When I heard the cop tell her that she blew 3 times the legal limit, I was blown away. I don't want to sound doubtful of the cop, because he did seem reasonably professional, but if that lady was 8 drinks deep-then I am deeply ashamed of my bartender-esque ability to pick a drunk out of a crowd. A quick search of the subject spits out tons of information about Blood Alcohol Level and the corresponding affects on the body. According to the University of Rochester, a BAC level of .21-.29 will result in 'stupor, loss of understanding, impaired sensations, severe motor impairment, loss of consciousness, and memory blackout'. Now as an observer to the whole situation, I find it extremely hard to believe that the lady was that boozed up...but in the words of W.C. Fields, "I've never been drunk, but I've often been over served".

Just to clarify my opinion, I think it's a real jackass move to drink and drive...but I also think that cops can be a bit overzealous about things from time to time. Everyday I see people come into the bar and have a drink, socialize with friends, and unwind a bit before getting on with their day. Almost everyone of those people are responsible about the whole situation, but it only takes one idiot to have a few too many and ruin their day or someone else's life. In the end, I can't feel too sorry for that lady...If she had money for cocktails, then she should have had money for a cab.